a goodbye and a hello

Saturday was a great day of local adventure filled with nice sceneries, interesting places and much picture taking. I do want to share our day here but first I need to address a heavier matter. After we returned home,  with much sadness, Rick shared with me that our dear little rabbit, Brobee had passed away. Instantly my heart broke, for the rabbit, for myself but more so for Natalie. I knew she would be devasted. She had him since he was this tiny little fluff and was her sweetest, most accessible pet. She loved to show him to others when we would have visitors and she just got the 'official' chore of checking his food and water. I am thankful to His providence that the day was so busy, she didn't do it. It was better for Rick to have found him (and not me as well). We knew we had to tell her but waiting until he was ready to be buried.

After Rick finished preparing Brobee's final resting place in the backyard, he along with my dad, came into the room to tell Nat. My heart ached the more at her instant reaction of complete grieving. I never seen her so heartbroken and tears from both our eyes spilled. What hurt most was that she kept saying how he was her only pet, her last pet that only belonged to her and how she was alone now. I couldn't help but to think of her, my child, my only child, who feels so 'alone' because she doesn't have any siblings. I know how she longs for companionship. I see it with the way she constantly wants to interact with us even when are discussing or addressing 'grown up' matters. I see it how she attaches herself to certain friends and cousins more than I see reciprocated at times. Her heart was truly broken and it also made me think of what will happen when a family member passes. I thought how awful it is going to be for her, if only I could save her from such pain. I quickly realized that there is no such thing as a safe place from death since it is and always will be a part of life.

We did our best to comfort and to console her. While Rick placed Brobee in the ground, Nattie and I picked some flowers from the front yard to place on his grave. We waited until some dirt was put over him so that the shock would not further add to our pain before we went out. Natalie helped Rick put the rest of the earth over him and we set sticks, flowers and candles over his grave. She asked God to please take good care of him in heaven and that she loved him. She also had us share just a little bit about him while we were gathered around him. It was warm and touching and I am so happy that we all had a chance to say goodbye.

While we stood around, I thought about how the only real way to deal with things is to just deal with it when it comes. You can't ignore it or brush it away. Death will happen. Even though she already been through the deaths of her little hamsters, this was the heaviest. Brobee meant more and I believe, represented more to her. It was difficult, it was but we did our best to talk to her and to explain things a bit more.

I don't want any one to suffer, especially a child, but we will all experience it. I don't want to nor do I want my loved ones too but it's inevitable. We had her stay in the room with us that night and talked a bit about it and when it was right, to lighten the sadness a bit with life. It was a sad night of love, regret, pain and goodbyes but the remembrance of him is what will stay in our hearts always.

So, where it seems one thing ends, another begins and on Sunday afternoon a new friend came to stay with us. While I napped from our return after church, Nattie and Rick went to the pet store to just to see what pets would be right for us. They came home and shared with me about a beautiful pale blue parakeet that she liked and would name him Pip if she got him. Later with Nat being watched by my mom, Rick, myself and my dad went to go get her new friend.

Pip is truly a beautiful bird and a nice addition to our family. I hope and pray we always do what is right by him and for us all to enjoy him. Needless to say, she is delighted over her bird. She is out spending the day with Rick right now but made sure to tell me to take good care of Pip. We even put his arrival to our home in our family diary.

We are thankful to life, in everything it brings, to it's love and heartbreaks too. Here's to life...